Some Things Are More Important Than Sex
Helping Comrade Senator Ron Johnson is one of them
Dear Comrade Senator Ron (whistleblower@ronjohnson.senate.gov)
I was in a hipster coffee shop yesterday in Doha, Qatar, and I overheard two Russians speaking in English to each other and they mentioned Hunter Biden’s other, other laptop that they had just recovered from a souk in Qatar. They downloaded the hard drive and discovered an ANTIFA plot to steal the absentee ballots from potential Trump supporters in Mississippi and write in Hillary Clinton’s name for governor. I couldn’t help jumping into the conversation and I mentioned your name, which gave me instant credibility with them. They said they knew you well and to say hello to you and to tell you the following: ‘when the moon glows red, activate plan B’. I hope that helps.
All the best,
Nancy
Dear Comrade Senator Ron (whistleblower@ronjohnson.senate.gov)
I happened to be walking along the beach on the island of Silhouette in the Seychelles this morning when I noticed a sea container washed up on the shore. Being curious, I looked at the side and noticed that it was last packed on November 4, 2020, in the city of Tulsa, Oklahoma. The door was open and there were literally millions of election ballots inside. I looked at them and discovered all the ballots were marked for President Trump. Oh, and there was a laptop computer on the floor of the container, and it had Hunter Biden’s name on it and a sticker that said it was the property of ANTIFA. What do you want me to do?
All the best,
Nancy
Dear Comrade Senator Ron (whistleblower@ronjohnson.senate.gov)
I was in a dive bar in Tijuana yesterday morning around 7:00 am, having a couple of shots of tequila to start the day, when I overheard two Cuban men talking in English together about a successful plot they had undertaken to microchip suburban soccer moms in Phoenix that programmed their brains to vote for Joe Biden for president. I also saw snakes crawling up the walls, but hallucinations are not uncommon to me. What should I do? Is there a Russian intelligence office here I can go to? You’re pretty well connected in Moscow; can you tell me who to call? RT? GRU?
All the best,
Nancy
